[personal profile] 7rin
From TakenUK
Tammy tells her shocking story to the conference of professionals in London
30th October 2006:-


"In the best interest of the child" that's what the professional's state, but even the professionals and the family courts can be wrong as they were in my case.

Let me explain about my birth family, and myself. I am a young adopted adult; I was taken from my mum nearly 17 years ago on a false allegation, I was seven months old and sitting in my bouncing chair, my mum had gone into the kitchen to make me a night feed. I was happily playing with an activity toy, which I dropped on the floor; I leant forward to reach the toy but the chair followed me arid tipped forward falling on top of me. I sustained a bruise on my cheek. And that's where my life was changed forever.

Read more... )
[personal profile] 7rin
Links to threads that have exploded, and which demonstrate aptly the attitudes displayed towards adoption and adoptees.

The Skeptical Mother's Page posted a picture of a very young bmom with her newborn baby daughter, just before she hands her over to the adopters.
[personal profile] 7rin
I'm gonna try to tidy this up to make it more readable, but I suspect if the thread continues, it's gonna wind up being dumped in comments too because I'm gonna run outta character spaces.

How do you feel about adoption?

Jennifer Randazzo Good.

Gloria Orange-Barnett The gift of a safe and loving home to a child in need is truly a gift to oneself.

Lynn Early Brown It is truly a blessing...I was adopted as an infant and my husband and I have adopted both our children thru foster-to-adopt! It is amazing and a gift from God!

Liz Larson-Shidler The best alternative.

Linda Wallin Thrilled! My son comes home from India today with his new son!

Angela Jensen Dunigan We are in the process of my husband adopting my daughter, which will legalize what has already existed for the past nearly 6 years - their father-daughter relationship. I love that she will now have our name too. She's 13 and I can think of no more critical an age for her to have this security of a loving, legal father. I also have loved ones with children whom they adopted at birth. I'm a fan of adoption.

...and then the adoptees start answering )

Seek Help!

Oct. 1st, 2012 08:09 pm
[personal profile] 7rin
Adoption Truth
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2012
Two Kinds Of Help

So, we've all been there. We've all heard it at some point or another . . .

When you dare to talk about adoption outside society's accepted views of rainbows and sunshine, you will be told, more than likely many, MANY times, that you need to seek help. That you are somehow sick and unhealthy for your views and opinions and should seek counseling so you can just be "happy" and accept adoption like everyone else does.

It's ironic, to me, when someone makes such a suggestion because I have actually sought help twice in my life.

The first was when I was sixteen and pregnant and trusted my adoption counselor to help me make the best decision for myself and my unborn child. At that time, I never imagined that their counseling was the same counseling they offered every pregnant mother who walked through their doors.

It was not about my own personal situation. It wasn't about me or my child. It was about how best to convince me to see adoption as a loving, selfless option so I would give up my child to the waiting couple who was willing to pay to adopt him.

I could have been Jane Doe from Anywhere, U.S.A. It didn't matter. The counseling would have been the same. Just as it still is to this very day for any vulnerable, pregnant mother trusting her counselor to help her make the right decision for herself and her baby.
Read the rest of the post over at Adoption Truth.
[personal profile] 7rin
My own lovingly designed t.shirts for adoptees with style, and available at the Post-Adoption Charity CafePress store. :)

The first image I created was the lovely nRFU that points out we're not Rainbow Farting Unicorns...

Adopted NOT = Rainbow Farting Unicorn

...which was created after yet another day of bouncing my head off a brick wall trying to educate people as to the HORRORS of adoption - even in a "good" or "successful" adoption (however you want to define those terms :p).

There's only, currently, two images available (not least because I am so inartistic that I have trouble drawing stick peeps!) in the Post Adoption Charity store, the second of which shares with the world the absolute TRUTH about why adoption hurts so damn much. To the point that I think if we could shift paradigms and remove the expectation of gratitude - there'd be a lot less screwed up adoptees. Thus, the t.shirt I spend the vast amount of my waking time wearing is the Adoption Loss quote...


"Adoption Loss is the only trauma in the world where the victims are expected by the whole of society to be grateful"
- The Reverend Keith C. Griffith, MBE

Feel free to purchase, and any money made on the store is staying there until I can get the head space to get Post-Adoption Charity (completely and utterly still in its infancy) up and running properly.

See also: http://www.cafepress.com/7rindom :}
[personal profile] 7rin
Adoption Loss is the only trauma in the world where the victims are expected by the whole of society to be grateful - The Reverend Keith C. Griffith MBEPlease sign the petition I've created:
Allow adult adoptees to be repatriated into THEIR OWN families
@
http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/38120



Posts within this community are under-going over-haul in an effort to make the information contained within them easier to find.

Sadly, the process of over-hauling is likely to cause those visiting from previously posted links to either encounter information they are not expecting to find, or possibly even dead links. I apologise to any visitor who encounters such difficulties, and ask that they refer to the community tag reference page in order to more easily find the information they were originally seeking.

During the course of time, the administrative staff of this community have been saddened to find that some of the valuable information that has been previously linked is no longer available from whence it originally came (perhaps it got surprise adopted? ;)), thus, as a ward against the loss of valuable information, many posts will now be replicated in full. If you are the original author of such works and oppose its replication on this site, please contact the administrative team on 7rin dot on dot adoption at gmail dot com.

The administrative staff of this community thank you for your time.
[personal profile] 7rin
Adoption Issues From a Strengths Perspective
By Deborah H. Siegel, PhD, LICSW, DCSW, ACSW
Social Work Today - July/August 2008 Issue - Vol. 8 No. 4 P. 34

Birth parents, adoptive parents, and adoptees face predictable crises given the life-changing nature of this event. Idealized or deficit approaches don't work, but a strengths perspective does.

Sam is a bright, energetic, enthusiastic 12-year-old boy. His mom and dad, Mary and Mack, love him dearly and are earnest, skilled parents who conscientiously create a nurturing home. Sam thrives; he has a best friend next door, gets Bs in school, attends weekly religious school and prayer services, walks his dog every day after school, and enjoys riding his bike and playing his electric guitar. He and his parents often go on hikes, attend sporting events, and take day trips as a family or with friends. It appears that Sam is doing well because he is adopted.

This description accurately summarizes Sam's life, and so does this: Sam was born with cocaine, marijuana, and alcohol in his tiny body. Sam's birth father, incarcerated shortly after Sam was conceived, has never seen him. The state child welfare agency removed Sam from his mother's custody shortly after birth, and in the first two years of life, Sam lived in four different foster homes before he was legally freed for adoption. Sam's behavior is often impulsive, hyperactive, and inattentive. His classmates tend to steer clear of him because he bumps into them, grabs their things, or blurts out rude comments (e.g., "You're stupid!"). Homework is a daily struggle, as Sam finds it hard to sit still and stay on task. He often forgets, loses, or partially completes his assignments. Lately, his behavior at home has been especially irritable; when his parents prompt him to do a task he doesn't like, he yells, "You're not the boss of me!" and stomps away. He's spending more time alone in his room. It appears that Sam is struggling because he is adopted.

Read more... )

- Deborah H. Siegel, PhD, LICSW, DCSW, ACSW, is a professor in the School of Social Work at Rhode Island College, a clinician specializing in adoption issues, an adoption researcher, and an adoptive parent.
[personal profile] 7rin
Trauma, Attachment, and Stress Disorders: Rethinking and Reworking Developmental Issues
@ http://www.healingresources.info/trauma_attachment_stress_disorders.htm

How does experience shape the brain and both cause and repair stress disorders? | How does early-life trauma impact development? | How does traumatic response differ from a normal stress reaction? | What are the common links between both high and low impact experiences that trigger traumatic responses? | What are signs and symptoms of developmental or relational trauma? | What overarching principles aid professionals with attachment and trauma issues? | What do professionals need to know when working with relational trauma? | Tips for therapists who have been trained in more traditional therapies

The rapid technological discoveries and advances in neuroscience that began in the 90’s have changed our perceptions about the origins of health, emotional and psychological stress, chronic physical illnesses and their healing. We now know that brain development is an experience-dependent social process that can override genetics. Knowledge of the brain's plasticity, immaturity at birth and capacity for life-long change, emphasizes the central role of early life experience in triggering stress disorders.

These stress disorders include PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome), depressive disorders, anxiety disorders, learning disabilities and chronic physical health problems. The new brain technology helps us understand the difference between normal stress responses that return to a state of regulation and traumatic stress responses that do not normalize. It also gives us reason to believe that neurological change from illness and disability to wellbeing is possible throughout life.

Read more... )

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