7rin's reunion (Y!A version)
Aug. 8th, 2009 12:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
7rin posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
7rin_on_adoptionTimeline went something like:
12th August 2009: Found 'em on FB
18th August 2009: Added mat.bsis on FB
19th August 2009: Dummy acc. PMed bmom
8th September 2009: FB conflab with bmom
9th September 2009: bmom turns up on doorstep
11th September 2009: Have met mat.bsis & meet mat.bbro
15th September 2009: Turned up on bdad's doorstep
6th October 2009: Have met Dad proper (why no date!!!)
13th October 2009: 'Session' with mat.bsis, mat.bbro & mat.bcuz
6th November 2009: bdad told pat.bbro about me
Was scheduled to meet bmom in a pub on 11th (was once been my local, but is closer to where she lives), along with mat.bbro and bmom's hubby, and a long-standing friend of mine who's also 'local' to the pub. What actually happened was that she 'phoned me from her mobile on 9th saying she was about to drive past anyway (legitimately) and so could she call in and meet 'cause she couldn't wait until the Friday. I said yeah 'cause tbh, waiting was killing me, and so she turned up on the drive in the car with a mate. I was a bit miffed that I couldn't tell which one she was gonna be until they got up the drive and she introduced herself - of course, once I had time to take everyone in, it was blatantly obvious which one my mom was, but at the door I had no clue. They came in, we drank cups of tea and coffee, and smoked fags, and talked about everything and nothing.
It was mind blowing.
Meeting dad was weirder, at least on initial viewing anyway. Mom had given me what she thought was his entry in the 'phone directory, on the day that the new 'phone directory for the area came out, and his number wasn't in it! I panicked. What if it *was* him, and he'd moved away? It was five minutes away, and so I *had to* go around to the address and find out if he was still there or not (if it was him at all). I took a deep breath and knocked the door.
It wouldn't've mattered if he denied all knowledge of me or not. I was stood looking in my physical mirror. Where I look (sound, laugh, sneeze, cough, strop, etc.) like my mom, I'm shaped like my dad. I'd never understood my body before because I didn't recognise it. I drove away from that first (very very short) meeting with my dad entirely validated in my own existence. I all of a sudden knew exactly where I'd come from.
Met mat.bbro in the pub on the day set up to meet mom, and mat.bsis at her flat. Haven't yet met pat.bbro but am deeply looking forward to it. And grumpy cow as she may be, I actually would like to meet my pat.bsis, despite her not wanting to have anything to do with me because she's in a snit with our dad.
Try not to go in with ANY preconceptions, because you have absolutely no idea what you'll find. All sides of my families have screw ups, but then I don't know a family that doesn't. The only difference is in the extremes, as far as I can see.
12th August 2009: Found 'em on FB
18th August 2009: Added mat.bsis on FB
19th August 2009: Dummy acc. PMed bmom
8th September 2009: FB conflab with bmom
9th September 2009: bmom turns up on doorstep
11th September 2009: Have met mat.bsis & meet mat.bbro
15th September 2009: Turned up on bdad's doorstep
6th October 2009: Have met Dad proper (why no date!!!)
13th October 2009: 'Session' with mat.bsis, mat.bbro & mat.bcuz
6th November 2009: bdad told pat.bbro about me
Was scheduled to meet bmom in a pub on 11th (was once been my local, but is closer to where she lives), along with mat.bbro and bmom's hubby, and a long-standing friend of mine who's also 'local' to the pub. What actually happened was that she 'phoned me from her mobile on 9th saying she was about to drive past anyway (legitimately) and so could she call in and meet 'cause she couldn't wait until the Friday. I said yeah 'cause tbh, waiting was killing me, and so she turned up on the drive in the car with a mate. I was a bit miffed that I couldn't tell which one she was gonna be until they got up the drive and she introduced herself - of course, once I had time to take everyone in, it was blatantly obvious which one my mom was, but at the door I had no clue. They came in, we drank cups of tea and coffee, and smoked fags, and talked about everything and nothing.
It was mind blowing.
Meeting dad was weirder, at least on initial viewing anyway. Mom had given me what she thought was his entry in the 'phone directory, on the day that the new 'phone directory for the area came out, and his number wasn't in it! I panicked. What if it *was* him, and he'd moved away? It was five minutes away, and so I *had to* go around to the address and find out if he was still there or not (if it was him at all). I took a deep breath and knocked the door.
It wouldn't've mattered if he denied all knowledge of me or not. I was stood looking in my physical mirror. Where I look (sound, laugh, sneeze, cough, strop, etc.) like my mom, I'm shaped like my dad. I'd never understood my body before because I didn't recognise it. I drove away from that first (very very short) meeting with my dad entirely validated in my own existence. I all of a sudden knew exactly where I'd come from.
Met mat.bbro in the pub on the day set up to meet mom, and mat.bsis at her flat. Haven't yet met pat.bbro but am deeply looking forward to it. And grumpy cow as she may be, I actually would like to meet my pat.bsis, despite her not wanting to have anything to do with me because she's in a snit with our dad.
Try not to go in with ANY preconceptions, because you have absolutely no idea what you'll find. All sides of my families have screw ups, but then I don't know a family that doesn't. The only difference is in the extremes, as far as I can see.